[(¯*♥¤»ƙɧՄՏɧՅԾԾ«¤♥*¯)]

ANGER





Barely had Adam and Eve been created, when they grabbed the forbidden fruit from the tree of knowledge of good and evil. In that seminal moment, anger and mankind were linked forever. Thousands of years later, it’s still the same. Angry thoughts and angry feelings, increasingly backed by angry actions, are again dominating human life.



People are getting upset for any rhyme or reason. Few days ago I heard about a youngster in Delhi who killed his father because “he wasn’t taking care of the family”. The son’s rage went to the extreme apparently because he saw no other way to deal with his frustration. This is happening more in the modern world where all and sundry do not endorse each other’s opinions. And what each one desires is not delivered. Somebody quoted that “anger is the spinal chord of the times we live in”. Evidently, there’s an outburst every seventh second.



Anger is a very normal state of mind. Without our aggression, we wouldn’t be able to achieve anything, there’s nothing wrong with being angry. The question is how to channel it. “Without our drive and aggression, we wouldn’t have achieved anything. There would be no justice if there was no rage of injustice. It is important to express our anger sometimes.” Most analysts agree though, that levels of frustration are probably more important than the external factors.


Elements of Anger



Blame game: Need is a key word behind the motive in such cases. People are generally needy, as they cannot cope with life on a daily basis. They do not find themselves loveable enough and do not find acceptance. Hence, they blame others. The resultant anger almost always leaves a mark on the other person.



Cycle of anger and resentment: The cycle, begins when a person starts to look at other people and blame them for not seeing his/her predicament and not solving the problems. Whatever or whoever it is that begins to tap a person’s fear and self-pity becomes a target for resentment. From self-pity, a person can only emerge in anger and resentment. Further leading to doubts, suspicion and accusations. And finally, ruined relationships.



Anger: Anger is a drive for action. It is good when reason controls anger. Not good when anger controls reason. There are two origins of the word anger one comes from the Latin word Ira meaning irritable. The other from the Old Norse word Angr meaning grief. It is the second nature to us. And our reactions are usually violent.


Manifestations of Anger



Quarrelling (Which could be verbal, physical or silent)
Cursing (Targeting at self, others and God)
Resentments, carrying hatred
Bitterness of speech
Arrogance
Sulking and pouting
Violence


How Anger hurts the body



There is essentially a link between anger and various ailments of human body. People are born as purely pleasure seeking animals. They remain so with modifications. People would like to believe that they are intellectual animals, meaning that they are governed by intelligence but they are not. People are full of feeling of anger that manifests itself in direct or disguised ways.



The expressions of anger are:

· I am annoyed

· I am irritated

· I am fed up

· I’ve had it

· I am sick and tired



In some, anger may be disguised in many ways such as



· Language

· Actions

· Body reactions

· Entertainment (clowning)



Some outlets may be healthy, as in humor or sports. In others, one may get aches and pains, injure others or self, or become withdrawn or depressed.


Headaches



There are many causes of headache including meningitis, brain tumors, abscesses and hemorrhages. By far, the most common cause is tension and tension is more often created by repressed anger.



Gastrointestinal Disorders



Repressed anger frequently uses the gastrointestinal tract that extends from the mouth to rectum as an outlet. People described as having week stomachs, throw up for the slightest cause. One factor to be considered is hidden anger.


Respiratory Disorders



The most common disease, “common cold” is probably related to repressed anger. Resistance may be lowered because of emotional stress and one of them is anger.


Skin Disorders



Repressed anger can affect the skin and one of the most common conditions is itching. When anger is repressed, it may lead to attacking the skin. One form that is particularly uncomfortable is itching around the rectal area.

Genito-urinary Disorders



Suppressed anger can affect genito-urinary tract. A common expression of anger is “Piss on him”. Some people urinate frequently because of repressed anger. Anger can cause sexual problems such as inability to have an erection or frigidity in females.


Arthritis



There are many causes of arthritis and repressed anger is certainly a contributory factor.


Nervous system Disorders



Neurologists are well aware of the role of anger in headaches and backaches. There’s a possible contribution of other neurological conditions such as strokes, tics of various sorts, speech disturbances.


Circulatory Disorders



Vacillations in blood pressure are a common outlet for anger. In an individual with coronary artery diseases and anginal attacks (diseases of heart causing pain), the condition is aggravated by emotions particularly anger.


Emotional Disturbances



As extensive are the effects of repressed anger on our physical being, their influence on our emotional lives is worse. There is a broad spectrum of emotional disturbances from withheld rage, extending from impaired judgement to suicide.


Harmful effects of anger



1. Anger almost always increases frustration.

2. Getting angry prevents a person from solving a problem because anger is not the solution to frustration. It is a reaction to frustration.

3. One sets poor example of mental health.

4. Anger makes a person physically sick.

5. Anger is the greatest single cause for break in human relationships.

6. Anger is responsible for one of the most depraved human behaviour – child and wife abuse.


What makes a person angry?



The sequence of anger build up is:



I want it my way
I didn’t get what I wanted and therefore I am frustrated.
It was awful and terrible not to get what I want. This leads to depression.



It is people who upset themselves by thinking in an upsetting manner.


If not anger than what?



Control anger: be calm and think twice.
Never give up thinking people can control their anger, even though difficult.
Remember behaviour counts, not words
Never forget how neurotic people are.
Count to 10.



What to do about anger?



Some helpful suggestions:

Recognize you are angry.
Identify the source
Understand why you are angry.
Deal with it realistically.



Constructively used anger can give strength back, physically and mentally. The individual must never be so overwhelmed by his anger that he is rendered ineffectual. Look for opportunities for some socially acceptable outlets.


Coping with upset feelings



People are upset with what they tell themselves! Our thinking about something and not the something itself, upsets us. No situation or person can upset us or make us feel bad. We are responsible for causing our feeling. Thus, when we judge or evaluate something in a negative way, we will usually be upset.



In contrast, when we judge or evaluate something in a positive way, we usually feel good. In other words, we feel the way we think. The more upset we are, the more upsetting and negative our thinking is likely to be.


What happens as a result of our feelings?



Actions. What we do generally depends on how we feel about a particular situation. When we get angry we might yell at someone. When we get depressed, we might withdraw. An upset person often acts in self-defeating ways. Many people use alcohol or other drugs to change their angry depressed feelings.



Because we feel the way we think, upset feelings mean upsetting thoughts. The degree of our upsetting emotion is a measure of how upsetting or negative our thinking is.

Some people also believe the way to temporarily change their upset feelings are through the use of mood–altering substances.

However, when we justify our upsets, we do not look at the underlining distressing beliefs that are really causing the upset feelings.

We are responsible for how we feel in regard to a situation primarily on what we think about that situation.

If our emotional upset results in self-defeating or destructive behavior, then it would be better to do something constructive about our upset feelings.

 

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[SHAYAN]

Gud
T 4 S

 

[ROSE]

Very nice

 

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Kabhi zindagi me kisik liay mut rona**
q k vo''tumhare ansoun k kabil nahi ho ga''
or ''vo'' jo is ''kabil'' ho ga vo tumhe ''rone'' nahi de ga''*****

[(¯*♥¤»ƙɧՄՏɧՅԾԾ«¤♥*¯)]

thanks

 

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[*NRB*]

bari gandi cheez hoti he yeh Anger

 

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[Abewsha]

nice sharing..............